Life is full of expectations; they are what keep us moving forward. But I don't know anyone who hasn't been disappointed a time or ten, or who's been lucky enough to have their expectations met every single time. That's the way it goes. Relationships, events, jobs, people will let you down. Your dreams will be dashed, your hopes crushed. You will be disappointed, and you'll be heartbroken. Such is life; it doesn't always show up on time, and it's almost never dressed appropriately.
But you have to learn to take it in stride. You can't fall apart with every disappointment, or become helpless with fear when reality turns out to be something other than what you expected.
I'm not saying you can't react; you have every right to do so. Take your moment, curse the heavens, blame your bad luck, shake a fist at the injustice of it all—but then move on. Don't quit. Pick yourself up off the ground you've been so ungraciously thrown to and take the next step. If that comes in the form of a hot fudge sundae, or a pint of Ben & Jerry's ice cream, or a Sunday matinee—whatever it takes to nurse your wounded soul back to good—then do it. Don't let disappointments and failed expectations shatter your resolve to keep going—to keep growing. People have said it before, and I'm going to say it again: Your life is bigger than the bumps you encounter along the way.
Because examples are useful for inspiration and context, I'm going to give you one. If you've been following the Winter Olympics over the past ten years, you'll be familiar with who I'm talking about. A man who is just as famous for his arrogance and flash as he is for his phenomenal performance on the ice, the Russian figure skater Evgeni Plushenko knows a thing or two about disappointment and failed expectations.
When he arrived at the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, BC, Plushenko was already a two-time Olympic medalist, with a slew of other championships, medals and world records under his belt. He was also the favorite going into the competition.
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But he didn't win in Vancouver, and the decision that resulted in awarding him a silver medal instead of gold sparked a heated
and ongoing controversy. (Read more about the Quadruple Jump Controversy here)
Many people took both sides of the controversy, but most disappointing to Plushenko was that The Russian Figure Skating Federation did not stand up and defend his right to gold.
After his disappointment in Vancouver, Plushenko could have quit figure skating. Many people would have understood his reasons: he's 31 years old this year, the oldest among his competitors; his career since 2010 has been plagued with injuries and multiple surgeries; he's had an impressive and successful career, has been an object of admiration and pride for countless Russian fans, and has earned the respect of the world.
But he didn't quit, and instead decided to come back for Sochi 2014, where he's already won a gold medal. His recent win earns him the distinction as the only male figure skater in the modern history of the sport to have won four Olympic medals in singles competing in four Olympic cycles (2002 through 2014).
Controversy aside, Plushenko's story is not only impressive because it shows dedication and determination, but it's also a perfect example of how great disappointment can be overcome and, ultimately, overshadowed. Our lives are riddled with disappointment and unmet expectations—none of us are unique in this. It's how we choose to be affected by these experiences, and how we grow from them, that really shows what we're made of.
Timely and worth the read…