“He who has a why can endure any how.” -- Frederick Nietzsche
Just recently my wife and I got an invitation to attend a parent’s meeting at my daughter's school. My first reaction was to tell my wife, “OK, let's divide and conquer, you go this time, and I go next time.” I wasn’t focusing on why it was important for us to go, but rather, this is something we HAVE TO DO so let's figure it out who is going to do it. She smiled and replied, “I think you should go this time?”
Most of us focus on what we need to do, what we have to do. Getting our tasks done is a never ending battle as the list continues to grow. I used to get overwhelmed by that list, but over time, I have learned that understanding WHY I have to do those things makes my decision-making process a lot easier. I get motivated by knowing that the things that need to get done have a higher purpose.
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There are a few images that are buried in my brain, one, in particular, is special. A man standing in front of a tank during the Tiananmen Square revolt in China a few years ago. That picture by itself is very powerful, and I always ask myself, why is he doing that? Just about every person in the world is in need to motivate himself or others. Some want to motivate you to make a purchase; others want your vote, and others want your time. Some tackle personal challenges, like stop smoking, getting out of that abusive relationship, changing jobs, things they have to do… but why?
It is easier to dismiss and even ridicule the things people do; I wonder if we would feel differently if we knew their why? Why are they doing that? Are they trying to influence us, are they trying to scare us, are they trying to motivate us in some way, or perhaps they don’t care about what other people do or think, and they are doing this for themselves.
I realize that we live in a world that is full of expectations, expectations that are placed on us by society and ourselves. We are expected to excel at work and at home accomplishing things that make us run around, focusing on the what needs to be done.
However, if we start examining our actions thru the lens of WHY, we will improve the process of prioritizing and making decisions based on “what is important to us?”. We were expected to attend our daughter's school meeting; that was something we needed to do. We reviewed the meeting agenda and realize that we were going to talk something important that relates to our daughter’s education. That is very important to us, our decision was easier when we look at the why we needed to attend, we both ended up going to the meeting.
It may sound simple, but that doesn’t mean it is easy, we live in a world that is expecting us to do an infinity amount of things. However, we need to take a step back and refine our expectations and make decisions based on what is important for us, finding your why will make thing easier.
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