Anxiety: Distress or uneasiness of mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune. [Dictionary.com]
To some, it is a dirty word, a word to be avoided if at all possible. And yet thousands of people live with anxiety, and are overwhelmed by it, every day. More and more I hear of a friend or family member who has had a panic attack, an event of such crushing anxiety that they’re left feeling helpless, terrified of another attack, as though anxiety were some outward assailant to contend with.
Like “friendly” or “easygoing,” “anxious” has become a common quality by which we define ourselves. What are we so anxious about? Most of us aren't in any danger of bodily harm. So if the traditional definition doesn’t apply, what is the cause? Can it be that we manifest our own anxiety, working ourselves into a frenzy of fear so that we are incapable of putting one foot in front of the other?
Maybe so. This world we live in is partly to blame. We rush through our days; we overwork, overcommit, overextend. We spend more time sitting in traffic and office chairs than we do taking care of ourselves. We forget to go outside, to do the things that remind us we are alive.
So how do we conquer anxiety? I don’t think it’s possible to be completely free of anxiety all the time—we are creatures of habit and prone to worry, after all—but there are ways to control it so that it no longer has the power to overwhelm us.
- Write it down – Putting your anxieties down on paper will help you identify the source. It might expose the irrationality of a particular thought or bring clarity to a specific fear.
- Get outside – Spending too much time inside can make us feel claustrophobic, like the walls are closing in around us. There is something about being outdoors, away from your television and electronic gadgets, that induces calm and steadies the racing going on inside you.
- Sweat - I know the last thing you want to do is get your body up and moving. But if you can, you'll feel better for it. Exercise builds endorphins, a substance akin to morphine that will elevate your mood and improve physical pain, as well as emotional pain and agitation. You can't help but feel better, no matter how dark your mood at the outset.
- Do something that makes you feel good about yourself – This can be anything—combing your hair out when you usually wear it up; treating yourself to a weekend massage; going for a walk during lunch instead of eating at your desk; choosing to stay in for dinner instead of eating out—whatever it is, just make sure it leaves you feeling happy to be in your own skin.
- Set a goal – You’ll take your focus off your immediate worries and propel it forward, channeling that energy into something that requires work and determination. For some people, this is signing up for a marathon, a feat that demands training and dedication. For others, it might be to find a new job or pay off a bill.
- Just breathe – Getting control of your breathing can be the simplest and most effective way to control your anxiety, although it can also be the most difficult. The first step is to become mindful; recognize when and how your breathing is affected by how you are feeling. Know when you are holding your breath, or taking short, hurried breaths. Controlling your breathing can slow down your racing heart, bringing calm when nothing else works.
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Because I believe in the power of words, I’ll share some synonyms to anxiety here: Certainty. Serenity. Tranquility. For me, just looking at those words gives me a lighter heart. They are three words I’d much rather use to define myself than anxious. Take these three words and use them as a mantra, reminding yourself that you are worthy of a better definition.
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